My best friend whom i’ve been close friends with for almost 9 years… is makin 21 this year. i’m also goin to make 21. the thing is.. her bf is i think goin to either make 20 or is 20, i’m not sure. recently we went to a convention in california for the vietnamese eucharistic society in orange county. i was hoping that her bf wasn’t goin to go, but he couldn’t trust her with us, so he went to make sure she “didn’t flirt or joke around with other guys.” ironically, when we got there, he was the one who was flirting with another girl and then told his g/f that he liked that girl. isn’t that absurd? but that’s not it, he made our whole trip horrible and always complained about everything. if he didn’t want to go together as a group, he makes her feel bad so she would stay with him. i mean, he always makes her feel guilty. on one of the day that we were in kali, we happen to meet a lady who wanted to tell our fortunes. well, i think she took hers a lil too serious!

y. the lady told her that she won’t be happy if she marry the one she loves, but if it’s the one that love her, then she’ll be happy. now she left us *her best friends* to be with him and to marry him even though he treats her so bad! i don’t know what to do, i feel bad that i don’t like her bf as much and i know that it’s her decision, not mines for her to be with. but i don’t think she would be happy with him. what should i do? (Sleepie)

Hey Sleepie,

It seems that you care for the future of your best friend at time. However, toward the end of your letter, there’s a sense of jealousy. That reminds me of one of Vietnamese sayings: “yêu thì ghen.” And I think that’s true… ’cause if we don’t love then we surely don’t care…

Here I think what you should do at this time, Sleepie:

1. Ask yourself to see if you’ve said or done anything wrong that makes your best friend left you. Was it because of the way you’ve treated her bf during the trip?

2. Talk to her directly to find out what was going on.

3. Don’t hesitate to say sorry if you’ve hurt her feeling… and try to make peace with her as soon as possible. 9 years of being best friend is such a good friendship that you don’t want to let it go away that easy.

4. Respect her decision.

5. Say her a prayer today… and perhaps on the days to come.

I say you and your best friend a prayer tonight. May God mend your friendship… and one more thing sleepie… don’t trust what the fortune teller tell you. Trust in Jesus!

In Christ,